out of habit

art is why i get up in the morning
but my definition ends there
and it doesn't seem fair
that i'm living for something i can't even define
there you are right there
in the meantime

i don't want to play for you anymore
show me what you can do
tell me what are you here for
i want my old friends
i want my old face
i want my old mind
fuck this time and place

out of habit - ani difranco

This colour always reminds me of you. Not sure why.
I want to run.
Do you know my instinct is to run?
Run far, far, far away from you and pretend that I'm ok.

I learnt the other day what an autofiction is.
This blog is my autofiction.

I don't want my life to turn out like the songs I listen to...
I don't want to always feel like such a coward.
I don't want to be holding on for all the wrong reasons.

But I don't know what the right reasons are...